Sam: Yes, that usually makes it better. I'm the person that leaves me cell on the desk, on vibrate, so when it wrings everything falls off the desk.
Katherine: No-one else seems to think I'm a terrible person when my phone goes off and I answer it, but I always feel guilty
Katherine: "wrings?" You've had a long day already.
Sam: Wrings... woo, go typing.
Sam: Yeah.
Sam: :P
Sam: The law doesn't require spelling.
Katherine: Except, I can imagine, where misspellings would change the meaning.
Katherine: Equal Rites and Equal Rights are not the same thing. :-P
Sam: Hahaha, true that.
Sam: Though you have the right to equally practice your rite, if you want.
Sam: The mind. She boggles.
Katherine: Provided that it doesn't interfere with others' rights to rites.
Sam: Depends on the others' rights, but for the most part, yes.
Katherine: (And if not, write your representative, har har har)
Sam: (Ba dum dum ching.)

For the record, conversations such as this are how things like "tea on the ceiling" were discovered.

Jes and I went to Home Depot today to buy various things to wreck the apartment with (me, as I bought giant nails of DOOM, not Jes... she just got paint or something). As Jes is even less assertive than I am, which is saying something, I went to asked the paint dude for some black paint. He then proceeded to say "Sure, honey," followed by fifty thousand other female nicknames of that sort ("dear," "doll," etc.) as he walked to go finish what he was doing.

Then he came over to help us (though mostly Jes, as it was paint for her... I just got giant nails of DOOM and some potting soil). Mixed the paint while Jes and I chatted, things seemed to be going well.

And then he came over to shake the paint (god I love the beer-in-paint-shaker Simpsons reference that that warranted). And then he asked: "Are you two sisters?"

Immediately what was going through my mind was: "If I say we're room mates, he'll think we're together." So I just said, "Nope." He looked at us again and I joked that it must be our rosey cheeks that made us appear similar.

And then, and this is the best part, he goes off on this whole tirade that includes the sentences: "Well, you two look good together," and "Don't worry about what anyone else things, so long as you look good," and "The world is changing."

So, clearly, not telling him we're room mates has the exact same effect as telling him we're room mates. Jes and I discussed it, in fits of laughter, in the car. She didn't answer that we were room mates for the exact same reason, and thought the irony of him assuming anyway was just as hilarious.

I keep running into people who graduated with me. I don't want to run into these people. I wouldn't mind running into my friends, because the reactions of my friends would be different. It's my friends, in fact, who've been so cool these past couple of days, and who make it easier not to break down after running into someone from school. 'Cause it's hard, and it sucks, to see the look in their eyes when I've said that I've failed or the awkward way the conversation just ends. And it's hard to wonder what they're thinking when they walk away.

But! There are my friends. Via email and phone and lunches and excursions to museums and whatever else. And it's exactly what I needed/need while I just get over this little hump of "oh wow, I'm a failure" and back to "eh, life." Which I'm hoping will happen soon.

To combat my sappiness, I bring you one the funniest things ever:

Monica sent me a link to a salon.com article about Stephen Baldwin's born-again ministry, and how it's super popular and, thus, super scary. They had a link to an interivew that radar did with him. This may be one of the funniest things I've ever read. I sort of wonder if it's real. How can something this funny be real?

Radar: We did a little homework. Which deadly sin have you been most guilty of in your life?
SB: Wow. What's sloth?

Radar: Total laziness.
SB: Hold on, I have a dictionary right here. I carry one because now I'm getting into ministry and I gotta know what I'm talking about. So let's look it up and be little Poindexters. Here it is: Slow-moving nocturnal mammal. Dude, that's it.

Other highlights include SB spanking his kids for not knowing the Ten Commandments that he doesn't know, calling himself "young little sweet little Jesus Freak Stevie B," and wanting to get Tom Cruise a spicy Jesus roll (of sushi, of course).

And, of course, he refers to God as Homey. Which I suppose is cool, but all I can think of his Damon Wayans in a clown suit beating people with a sock.


Word.

I hope they leave it as Xena. That'd be awesome.

I linked to that particular editorial because it's so delightfully and snarkily British. No, really:

So if the Americans are allowed to name planets after TV stars, perhaps we should revert to calling Uranus by its proper, British name. The gas giant, which in contrast enjoys a balmy climate of up to minus 214C, was originally called George's Star in honour of the third king of that name, having been spotted by naturalised Briton William Herschel in 1781. Like Bombay and Calcutta, the planet's name was de-Anglicised, though the end result was merely two centuries of classroom sniggering.

Hahaha. That's not even the best part.

Ah, astronomy. I always knew you could be fun!

Today was the annual Talent/No-Talent Show at school. Actually, today still is as it's still going (it started over three hours ago). I stayed 'til part way through the second act.

It's general funniness, made funnier by all of our shared experiences in school. I was feeling particularly "high on life" because tomorrow is my last day of law school, so I cheered a lot more than I normally would have, probably.

And Tom performed a song called "Cheney's Got a Gun" which he and I wrote (to the tun of "Janie's Got a Gun") yesterday. And of course I mean he wrote the large majority of it and I wrote about four to six lines. But they were the lines that got the most laughs, dagnabit.

( These are the lyrics, pretty much. I bolded the ones I remembered contributing, though it got muddled in some parts. )

(c)2006

So, yeah. Five lines that I remember. But funny!

[There was mild 1L contact, but... mild. And tomorrow's the day. It's gotta be. Friends or not. No more excuses, except the ones I come up with tomorrow. Rah.]

And now I've got about 36 hours to finish two of my finals, and... well... that sucks.

I think etoilepb may find this particularly funny, but anyone who's ever had to deal with the T in Boston will get a kick out of it (particularly users of the green line).

Snark. I love The Onion. My friend Jen sent this to me in an email saying, "Do you think the EU will adopt this?"

My EU teacher is a gas. A total gas. Besides telliing us that we'd be invaded by China within 50 years (it... could happen, but much more likely that we'll be economically destroyed by them rather than physically), but then she went on about how the entire world once spoke the French language. Quasi-true, but mostly an expression of her personality: she takes some sort of fact and then completely mangles it in favor of French supremacy. I think she's effing fantastic, and I love her fractured history lessons. It's worth having taken the class just to hear them.

I phoned in both Labor and Trusts and Estates today. Oops. I'm seriously considering skipping Labor tomorrow, what with the snow being enough for me to have a lame excuse, but I have a student government meeting after that. What kind of hack elected me to student government? (Just kidding). There's lots of stuff going on, so it's probably worth going. I'm also now on the Commencement Committee. Oy.

I have to bring Kate back her car 'cause she lent it to me to go to Trader Joes (that place is amazing... seriously). So off I go. Back in under an hour, hopefully (have to walk back, which is the part I don't want to do).

Hillarious.

I got an email from my supervisor from last winter. The Appeals Court has scheduled my case for September 14th. Great. I may actually be able to do it. It'll just cost a couple of hundred dollars and involve some very deft time management.

We'll see. I'll be bummed if I can't do it.

So, uh, the 10th planet? Yeah, it's called Xena.

I'm sorry, that's just about the best thing to happen to science since Al Gore invented the internets.